Lana visits the Shadowlands, Part 1 of 3

This one was trickier to write than the last few. I found inspiration on a walk very similar to the one Lana takes with her parents, but after spending the evening wrestling with it, had to put it aside and finish it today. It could still benefit from some tweaking, but I’m happy enough to post it and invite comments now. Happy reading. 🙂 

 

‘I hate you, leave me alone.’

The door slammed behind her and she stared at it until the shaking in her hands died away. She stomped across the room, making sure every footfall would be heard in the kitchen below, and threw herself onto the bed.

I mean it, she thought. I mean it for real this time. They’ve evil, pure evil. The entire point of their existence is to ruin mine. Why do they hate me so much? Why did they even have me if they didn’t like me?

She rolled over and stared at the wall. Down below in the kitchen, the shouting started up, same as always. She pulled her pillow over her head and waited for the inevitable slam of the back door. It came quicker than usual this time as dad stormed out.

Peace descended.

Lana tensed, her back becoming the barrier with which she defended herself against the inevitable tapping on her bedroom door.

‘Sweetheart, can I come in?’

‘Go away.’

‘Come on now, sweetie, there’s no need for that.’

‘Go away and leave me alone. I never want to talk to you again.’

The door clicked open and Lana tightened her shoulders. If she curled in a tight-enough ball, mum wouldn’t be able to unroll her. She wished she had spines so mum couldn’t even come close. Her bed sagged and mum’s hand landed on her arm.

‘Please, darling, I need you.’

She needed her. What a joke that was. If she needed her, maybe she should be nice instead of judging her. Judging her was all she ever did, over and over again.

‘Go away.’

‘Please, darl—’

‘Go away, go away, GO AWAY.’ Tears came running down her face as she sat up. Mum jumped off the bed and Lana felt good for all of a second about the look on her face. Then the guilt set in. She opened her mouth, but by then the life had gone from mum’s eyes and she was backing away.

The door clicked quietly shut. Lana grabbed her pillow and threw it, following it up with Mr Tricks. The rabbit bounced off the door, rolled over and came up looking at her. His glass eyes, once so cute, seemed to mock her. She scowled at him but received only the usual smile, so she turned away to face the wall.

Lana liked this patch of wall. It was plain and white and simple and didn’t ask her any questions or shout at her. She stared at it until her teeth finally stopped clenching and the sound of mum doing meaningless baking drifted up through the floor.

 

The next day they went for a walk. It was one of their mundane, inane, pointless Sunday activities that was supposed to be quality family time, but was instead excruciating and boring. Lana quickened her pace the minute they reached the river path. She got far enough ahead that she couldn’t feel the glares being exchanged above her head.

Why didn’t they get a divorce? Shauna’s parents got a divorce when she was, like, nine, and she was fine. They said it was for her, but since they both hated her and everything she was, it made no sense.

They hadn’t always hated her. It seemed to start when they moved here.

She’d liked living in the city. Apparently they came out here for her as well. She paused to stare at the ducks. They were digging at one another with their beaks and making sounds not unlike mum and dad when they were having a bad day. She scowled at them and wandered on.

The schools were better here, apparently. She’d only been in comprehensive school for three years, but she already knew it wasn’t better than where she’d been. There were less people and not one of them knew anything about the world. They all had two parents and nice cars and skiing holidays. Except Shauna, of course, but Shauna was different.

She grinned and pulled out her phone. She could text Shau—

‘Lana!’

She ground her teeth together and put it back in her pocket. This was that counselor’s fault. No phones at the weekend, unless you were alone. She took a deep breath and wrinkled her nose at the smell of duck poo. She was fourteen, what the hell did they care if she had her phone out?

It was better than talking to her parents. Or listening to them quietly bitch at one another.

‘Lana, your mother and I would like to talk to you about something.’

She glanced back. Dad was staring at the ducks and scowling. So this was gonna be good. She looked at mum. She looked so tired. She looked so pathetic.

Lana set off. She raced away from the river and across the grass. There were wide meadows beside the water with tall, narrow trees at the far end. The sun was low in the sky, throwing shadows the length of the field.

She ran so the wind blew out her hair and made her cheeks sting. She laughed, though she had no idea why she was laughing. Maybe it was the sound of mum’s voice, calling her to come back. Maybe it was just better than crying.

The shadows played across her face like fingers, first pressing down, then away, then down again.

She ran through a shadow larger than most and her laughter dried up like two day old cereal. It felt like someone had grabbed her heart and given it a good squeeze. She gasped as the air in her throat became so cold she couldn’t breathe. Then she left it behind and the sun stole the shock.

The next shadow was bigger still and she had a second to realise there were no trees big enough to cast one that big before she reached it. She plunged into the shadow and out of the sun, and the world went black.

 

Lana stopped so fast her shoulders didn’t realise and she nearly toppled forward. Her hands went out to stop her fall and someone grabbed them. She screamed and flailed about, fending off her mysterious attacker.

‘Please, young lady, be careful where you swing those things.’

That wasn’t mum or dad. With an accent like that, it may as well be the queen. Why was it so dark? She blinked and looked behind her. Darkness. Complete and utter darkness.

She looked forward again and saw something. A glint, like light catching metal. A flame burst into life and she covered her eyes, squinting.

‘Oh goodness, I am sorry, how thoughtless of me. Here.’

The light dimmed considerably and she cautiously removed her hand. The man held a lantern. It was one of those old fashioned ones, with black, wrought iron top and bottom and, at the moment, an iron guard in front. The bearer suited the lantern perfectly.

He wore trousers that ended an inch or two above his perfectly shined, black leather shoes. His waistcoat and top hat only added to the impression that she was talking to someone from, like, the 1960s. He also had a moustache, which was very much eww, but not as bad as some she’d seen.

‘Are you doing Movember?’

‘I’m sorry?’

‘You know, that charity thing?’

He frowned and shook his head. ‘I’m sorry, young lady, I’m not entirely sure what Movember is. But I am fairly confident that I’m not taking part in it.’

‘Right. Where am I?’

‘Where are you? You are in the Shadow Lands, where else?’

‘Well, I kinda thought I was in Marlow.’

‘Oh, well, perhaps you were. You all come from somewhere. But now you are here.’

‘Great, thanks, very helpful. Where are mum and dad?’

‘Where did you say you thought you were?’

‘Marlow?’

‘Yes. I would imagine they are there, then.’

‘Right. What?’

‘The Shadow Lands. My domain.’ He frowned. ‘I am sorry, I’m being remiss in my hospitality. My name is Mr Wilson, welcome to my home.’

‘Right. What?’

He smiled and waved a hand. The world lit up around her and she covered her eyes again. She looked around and saw the fields and the river. Mum and dad were on the towpath, staring wide eyed towards her. She waved. ‘Hey, I’m here.’

They took no notice of her. Not a surprise. Then mum ran towards her and Lana spotted the tears on her cheeks. What the hell. Mum was running, actual real running and she wasn’t slowing down. Lana leapt aside, but mum kept going.

‘Mum, I’m here.’

‘She cannot hear you.’

‘Why not?’

‘You are in the Shadow Lan—’

‘Yeah, you said that. What does it mean.’ She blinked, surprised by the tears pricking the corners of her eyes.

‘Look around you. Properly.’

Lana did, scrubbing her eyes with one hand. The shadows that fell across the field were darker now, richer. It was like someone had come along and painted them onto the grass. The sunlight, on the other hand, was pale and barely worth mentioning. Lana shivered. ‘Where am I?’ she muttered it to herself, but Wilson heard her.

‘You have left behind the world that you know and journeyed into Shadow. We lie behind the reality to which you have become accustomed. We walk just behind them and just in front, but never with.’

‘Why?’

‘Ahh, a better question. I would hazard a guess you saw something here that was better than what you had out there.’

‘That wouldn’t be difficult.’

‘There you are, then.’

‘But…’ she rubbed her face with the palms of her hands and shook her head. ‘I mean, what?’

He patted her gently on the shoulder. He wore black gloves but it was still touching. She shied away.

‘I apologise. Some find a little physical contact reassuring at this time.’

‘Don’t you physical contact me. How old are you?’

‘As old as the sun, more or less.’

‘Oh…’ Her thoughts ran around like a headless dog. They wanted to please her, but had no idea where to start. There was a very strong possibility she was still asleep. It was that or she’d fallen in the river and this was drowning. It was far more interesting than she’d imagined.

‘Would you like to take the tour?’

‘The tour?’

‘Indeed. You have to choose a shadow.’

‘What?’

‘You seem to like that word. You might find adding more detail to your questions garners more helpful answers.’

She scowled at him. He reminded her of dad, only without shouting at her. ‘Fine. Why do I have to choose a shadow?’

‘Well. You’ve come to the Shadow Lands and most who do so, choose a shadow.’

‘What if I don’t want to?’

‘You may leave any time you like.’

‘What, like, right now?’

He held out a hand. ‘Please, be my guest.’

Lana looked past him to where mum had turned around and was stumbling back across the field. Dad was digging about near the trees, like she’d burrowed beneath them. Mum shouted something and dad scowled at her and threw his arms up. She could go back and make them alright. For all of five minutes.

‘Okay, where do we start?’

Shadows smiled and set off. As he walked, the light around them dimmed until the world went away and left the two of them marching in the glow of his lantern.

 

Part Two will be here Thursday 4th December

Podcast – Scarlet’s Web – Episode Eight

Scarlet’s Web is the fourth chapter in the life of Scarlet Rose Parker, Tumblr veteran, lover of pizza and Harry Potter-obsessed teenage magician.

In episode eight of Scarlet’s Web, Scarlet met Red Riding Hood. It turns out it’s not just the hood. Red’s fighting leathers are the same colour, not to mention skin tight and somewhat distracting. Just as Scarlet beat her conscience to the floor and got her flirt on, Granny started screaming…

Written, read and produced by Michael Cairns.

The next episode will be available to download next week. Happy listening.

Podcast – Scarlet’s Web – Episode Seven

Scarlet’s Web is the fourth chapter in the life of Scarlet Rose Parker, Tumblr veteran, lover of pizza and Harry Potter-obsessed teenage magician.

In episode six of Scarlet’s Web, Scarlet went to prison, then had a meeting with some guys whose title is way too long and boring to talk about here. She decided she couldn’t go home without saving her skinny self. That was when things began to get interesting…

Written, read and produced by Michael Cairns.

The next episode will be available to download next week. Happy listening.

Podcast – Scarlet’s Web – Episode Six

Scarlet’s Web is the fourth chapter in the life of Scarlet Rose Parker, Tumblr veteran, lover of pizza and Harry Potter-obsessed teenage magician.

In episode five of Scarlet’s Web, Scarlet and her skinny self were bundled into the van and carted away. Skinny was taken into some mysterious building whilst Scarlet was transported to the extra-dimensional holding cell, where she saw Martin. Only it wasn’t Martin…

Written, read and produced by Michael Cairns.

The next episode will be available to download next week. Happy listening.

Three Choices – A Modern Fairy Tale about Old Problems – 2 of 2

Here is Part two of Three Choices. I hope you enjoy it and, as always, please leave a comment at the bottom. 

 

Another five years went by and Astil finished his schooling. He had raced ahead of his peers and when his fifteenth birthday came around, was working with wise men from the local university. His area of focus was on the workings of the mind and he was discovering things daily that no other man had yet to find out.

His name was spreading. Academics from all over the world came to visit and speak with the young prince and to all he gave his time generously. They left invariably talking about his kindness and fierce intelligence.

His birthday dawned bright and sunny and he opted to ride down to the town whilst his parents took the coach. His father had, in the last couple of years, taken the coach more than his own horse. Astil had noticed it only in the offhand way fourteen year olds did and thought nothing of it. He knew his parents were getting older; his father’s hair was greying at the temples and his mother’s beautiful face was bearing a few, hair-thin lines from the corners of her eyes.

He charged down to town with his two guards and spent the morning idling in the central square. His relaxed way around the commoners meant that more than one of the local girls made to dance and flirt with him. He made no attempt to dissuade them and to anyone watching, was having a wonderful time.

Inside, though, the young man’s mind was occupied. The laughter and pretty faces of the girls failed to move him in the same way as the numbers and research of his more recent study and more than once he missed something said to him as his mind wandered down new lines of enquiry.

He was fending off two of his more amorous admirers when his father’s body guard hammered into town. His horse was heaving and its flanks were covered in sweat. The man spotted the prince and leapt down from his horse. He knelt and looked up at Astil with eyes the young man realised with shock were filled with tears.

He didn’t need to say anything. Moments later the four of them hurtled back out of town. Astil drove his horse on until the wreckage of the coach appeared on the road before him. They had been coming around the corner when the axle on the coach went and despite the excellent workmanship, when the body of the coach struck the road, it shattered.

Astil dropped from his horse and staggered to where his mother and father lay by the side of the road. The magician and doctor from the castle were already there and made no effort to disguise the truth from the young prince.

‘Their bodies are sound. The king has a fractured wrist, but it will heal well enough. Their minds, though…’

Again, the question of irony reared its ugly head. This time, though, Astil was in no position to consider it. The king and queen had both suffered severe trauma to the head and would remain unconscious until such time as Astil asked the magician to remove the spells that were, at this point, keeping them alive.

The men with him spoke that night as they raised a glass to their king, of his admirable control and restraint. They said he spoke in a calm, quiet voice as he instructed the soldiers to move his parents up to the castle and ensure they were comfortable. The doctor and magician went with them and, once again, the new king didn’t order, but rather requested that they remain by his parents.

If any of them thought it strange that the boy went back into town and celebrated his birthday with all those who had been waiting for him, they didn’t say so. Instead they talked about how much he’d grown and how proud his father would be that he continued to put the wellbeing and happiness of his subjects above all else.

 

Five years passed and on the eve of his twentieth birthday, the king sat at his parent’s bedside. As he had done every night for the last five years, he spoke to them. He didn’t know whether they heard him. His studies showed that there might be something going on inside, but he knew no more than that. It didn’t matter.

The magician had assured him a number of times that they would never recover and he knew it was the truth. There was nothing behind their eyelids when he lifted them and peered inside. They looked much like his own eyes when he looked in the mirror each morning.

‘War is coming, father. The southern kingdoms are united and have taken everywhere from Silthous to the Canny Sea. They will be coming for us before long.’

The young prince paused and put his head to one side. To anyone watching, it would have looked like he was listening to something. Perhaps it was his father reminding him of a blessing laid twenty years previously. Or perhaps it was only the sound of his lonely heart, thumping in his chest.

‘I love you both.’ His voice caught in his throat and he bent forwards until he pressed his forehead against the soft sheets beneath which his parents had spent the last five years.

As morning broke over the kingdom, word went out that the king and queen had died peacefully in the night. For the first time in twenty years, Astil didn’t celebrate his birthday. Instead, he buried his parents, then prepared for war.

 

The fighting lasted a full nine months and he returned to the castle as spring brought leaves and birds to the woods around the city. He rode through them with his army behind him and as they entered the city, a roar the likes of which Darial had never heard rose from the people lining the roads.

Astil hadn’t stopped at winning the war. He’d chased the armies back to their homes and forced a surrender that would last a hundred years. He was king of not only Darial now, but also every square mile of land between the Spine of the World and the Canny sea. His power was absolute.

That night he sat in his castle and sipped mulled wine, thinking on the campaign from which he’d just returned. It had been easy. It had been too easy. Every battle had worked out just as he’d predicted. His enemies had done exactly what he thought they would.

His thoughts spiraled back to his studies. He had never found them difficult either. Sure, some things he had had to work at and others had confounded him, sometimes for days! But it had never taxed him.

As he was climbing into bed, he reached for the woman who currently shared it and wondered about her, as well. He was a prince, so finding people to spend time with was never difficult, but finding women to take to his bed had been even easier. He’d never had to find the right line or woo them. They had come like leaves fall in autumn.

He slept badly that night and woke knowing what he had to do. The journey would take only a week each way, so he left his steward in charge of the castle and trusted the kingdom to run itself. He set off alone as the sun struck long lines of gold across the land and headed north for the mountains.

 

Six days passed and his food was all but gone when he spied the cave mouth. A wind that cut straight through his cloak had him shivering and he wouldn’t at that point have worried had the cave been home to a bear. But as luck had it, when he tied his horse up, rubbed him down as quickly as he reasonably could and covered him for the night, a young blonde woman beckoned to him from the cave mouth.

He went in and found a fire blazing at one end. The smoke was escaping somehow and the light in the cave was clear and bright. It made looking at the woman even more pleasurable than the brief glance he’d got from outside. Her beauty took what was left of his breath away and if he thought the skimpy clothing she wore was odd for someone who lived in the mountains, he didn’t mention anything. In fact, no words were shared as he divested first himself of his heavy garb then did the same for her considerably lighter outfit.

The oddest thing when he awoke was that he could remember nothing of the previous night past their first kiss. He could close his eyes and picture her naked body, but he couldn’t see himself with her. He rubbed his eyes and sat up. The cave was empty and the fire cold. He dressed, shivering, and stoked the fire. It lit quickly and the cave filled with smoke.

Gasping and coughing, Astil ran outside to where his horse whickered softly to him. He patted it and gave it what was left of the oats in the saddlebag.

He jumped when he saw them waiting.

He didn’t know how he knew, but the three women stood across the narrow plateau were the very same that had attended his bedside twenty years previously. He recognised the youngest and blushed at the brazen look she gave him. The middle of the three ladies stepped forward and Astil’s breath caught in his throat.

It wasn’t his mother, he knew that, but her likeness was close enough that a lump formed and stopped him swallowing.

‘Welcome, young prince. You are a long way from your kingdom.’

‘My ladies. I came searching for you.’

‘You certainly did that.’ said the youngest.

He blushed again and cleared his throat. ‘I need to speak to you.’

‘You’re doing that quite well at the moment.’ The eldest sounded nice, friendly, and he turned his attention to her. ‘I do not mean to sound ungrateful, but when I was born you attended me and gave me three blessings. Is that right?’

The ladies nodded and the youngest smiled slyly. ‘Last night, it could be said, I gave you a fourth.’

‘Hush, young one, let him speak.’ The eldest sounded harsher when speaking to the blonde.

‘I want you to take them back.’

The eldest folded her arms and tutted. The middle put her hands on her hips and stared at him frankly. The youngest crossed the space between them and stood until he could feel her breath on his chin.

‘I do not think you can take back what you gave me last night, can you?’ Her whispering voice made him shiver and his hands longed to grab her. But he took a careful step backwards and cleared his throat. ‘My life has not been my own. I didn’t understand that until last week. I have been making choices, but they were not my own.’

‘Your father accepted our blessings. I’m sorry, laddie, but nothing can be done.’ The eldest said.

‘We have swapped blessings, so now the deal it doubly sealed.’ The youngest said before turning and walking back to her sisters.

The middle one looked at her sisters, stepped forward and cocked her head to one side. ‘There is one way we can undo our blessing. We can give you back everything you’ve lost, but it will require a sacrifice.’

The prince thought about his sacrifices. He thought about his dog, though he remembered him only vaguely. He thought about his horse and the parents he remembered very well. He knew about sacrifice. He didn’t think he had anything left to give, so what did he have to lose?

He nodded. ‘What do you require of me?’

‘Nine months from now, your son will be born.’

Astil’s eyes opened wide and he stared at the youngest, who patted her stomach and smiled at him.

The middle sister went on. ‘He will grow up to be the most powerful man ever to walk the Earth. People will hear his name and tremble, for he will be terrible and mighty. His name shall strike terror into all who hear it.’ She paused and glanced sideways at the other two, both of whom nodded. Astil shuddered as the eldest smiled sadly and turned away. ‘All that we ask, if that you raise him and let him be whatever he needs to be. Every choice and every decision must be his.’

‘What if I consider those choices unwise?’

‘Every choice, every decision.’

‘But what if he is doing something foolish? What if he is doing something dangerous?’

‘Every choice, every decision.’

Astil turned away and looked out over the mountains. The sun turned the sky a pale blue as his breath misted in the air. He would have a son. Yet another thing that wasn’t his choice. But if he said yes, everything hereafter would be. He turned back to the ladies and nodded. ‘I will do it.’

 

He awoke wrapped in furs beneath the overhang of the cave. Astil rubbed sleep from his eyes and yawned. How long he’d been sleeping he had no idea, but he felt refreshed and buoyed up. The view from the mountains was glorious and he was glad he’d come up here on the way home. The thin air had cleared his mind and given him new hope for the cure.

The ride home seemed shorter. His saddlebags had been filled miraculously with food and the weather cleared, making his return journey down into the lowlands and spring pleasant and easy. His horse was darker than he remembered and moved with an ease and grace that amazed him.

He first saw the smoke two days from home.

The first refugees passed him later the same day. He recognised them from the town, but they looked quite different out here on the road. Harsh eyes bore into him as they refused to speak and answer his questions. He spurred his horse on until he reached the last hill before the city. He reined in at the top and stared at Darial.

The old castle was in ruins, flames leaking from windows and smoke filling the sky. Rising with the smoke came the screams of victims from down in the city. He set off at a gallop, but without knowing why, guided the horse left of the city and into the woods that guarded it on that side.

As he rode into the shadows cast by the vast canopy of leaves and branches, the feeling of coming home was overwhelming. The trees before him broke apart and he came into a clearing. He had never been here, he was sure, but he knew instinctively where to tie his horse and the creak of the front door seemed as familiar as the acrid smell that assaulted him on the other side. The dog bounded up to meet him and just like that, he was home.

The room was filled with test tubes and beakers, bubbling liquids and all manner of books. His research. He struggled with it and in part it was because he just wasn’t as smart as the others. His teacher thought that his emotions clouded his vision and perhaps he was right. He took the stairs two at a time and pushed gently into his parents’ room.

They lay side by side and he breathed a sigh of relief that Old Janner had done what he promised. The sheets were fresh and clean and the window was open. Astil knelt at their bedside, took his father’s withered and dry hand and pressed his forehead to it.

‘I’m home. I’m sorry I had to go away. They don’t have the equipment here. But I’ve got it now. I’m sure I’m going to crack it this time. You’ll be awake soon, I promise you.’

He left them and went back downstairs. He was sore from riding, but couldn’t help pulling the apparatus from his saddlebags and setting them up. He could get the experiment going before he got some sleep.

The sounds of screaming reached him, but the house deep in the woods was hidden and safe from the invading southern armies. They still hadn’t found him nine months later, when a basket appeared on his doorstep, containing a newborn child and a note that simply said:

Every choice, every decision.

 

Three Choices – A Modern Fairy Tale about Old Problems – 1 of 2

This story emerged on Sunday, fully formed and it was great fun to write. It was only once I’d finished that I realised how close it is to my heart and the things going on in my life. My son was born seven weeks ago and my daughter is three and a half and both are making me think about all sorts of things. 

I hope you enjoy it and I’d love to know your thoughts. The second half will be out on Thursday. 

 

In a kingdom, further away than tomorrow but nearer than the stars, a baby boy was born to the king and queen of the land. He was their first child and they were overjoyed.  The kingdom celebrated for six days and seven nights, for their new king to be was a bonny lad, with smiles from the moment his eyes opened and cheeks that simply begged to be squeezed.

On the seventh day, as the sun rose above the largely hung-over capital city of Darial, three women arrived at the doors to the castle. The doorman spoke with them briefly and then ushered them inside. So it was that when the king left his private chambers and headed into the courtroom to begin the day’s proceedings, the three ladies awaited him.

The king was a proud man, though not too proud. He was caring and kind and thought every day on how he could better the lot of his people. Today though, he hoped for a quiet one. Most of his subjects were sleeping off six days of free drink and food and he imagined he would spend much of the day snoozing in his chair or signing less important documentation.

His eyes widened fractionally at the sight of the women, but he took the time to settle himself in his chair and have a sip of tea before beckoning them forward.

‘Ladies, welcome to Darial. As you can see, the court is quiet today, so please, tell me what is on your mind.’

The ladies performed the standard obeisance, and if the eldest failed to bow quite deeply enough, the king overlooked it. She was aged beyond belief, lines as deep as a well criss-crossing her sharp, narrow face. That she had come to his kingdom at all spoke of endurance beyond that suggested by her frail frame. Indeed, before they began to speak, he felt moved to inquire, ‘From where have you come? It is early for you to have travelled far today.’

The middle of the three ladies stepped forward. ‘Your grace, we have travelled day and night since your son was born. It is a long way from our kingdom to yours.’

The king stood, hand clasped to his breast. ‘You are royalty? Forgive me, I would have shown quite different manners had I known you came from royal stock.’

The lady shook her head. ‘We have a kingdom, but are in no way royalty. Please, sit.’

The king found himself sitting before he had time to ponder on what sounded suspiciously like an order. The woman was easy to obey. She reminded the king of his wife, just a little. She had a warm, wide face and eyes that knew more than he did. Had he been pressed to guess an age, which of course he would never do, he’d have ventured somewhere in middle age, whilst hastily lowering the age at which middle age began.

He inclined his head. ‘Please, continue.’

The woman to his right stepped forward and curtsied. ‘We are here to bless the boy.’

The king had yet to examine the third lady and at this moment he regretted his tardiness. She was young, but not too young for him to be aware how attractive she was. She carried herself with a straight back and proud bearing, but his eyes fixed on her face. Her lips were full and held slightly apart, as though she were mid breath. Her eyes were dark and promising and her nose filled the space between in perfect symmetry. He had always fancied himself a brunette man, but the long blonde hair that hung to her waist only added to her beauty.

He took a few deep breaths and stilled the movement in both his heart and his trousers. ‘You wish to bless my child?’

‘We do, your grace.’

He blinked. They hadn’t the look of religious types, but his mother had warned him to never anger the church, or indeed anyone else claiming particular fealty to an omnipotent being. She called it playing safe and he wasn’t one to spurn such sensible council.

He snapped his fingers and demanded the servants bring his son to him. Minutes later, the wet nurse carried him through. He was fussing and wriggling, clearly and justly annoyed at being stopped mid-feed. But the moment the three ladies gathered around, he stilled and stared up at him with those piercing yet unknowing eyes of the newly born.

The king approached, but something kept him from pushing his way through to take his son. He had held him a number of times since his birth and revelled in the new, barely-there weight of this tiny part of himself. But in that moment he felt alone and isolated. The ladies had made of the throne room their own space and he wasn’t a part of it.

The ladies were speaking and he leaned closer to hear. The young one spoke first. ‘You, young Astil, shall be the most handsome man in all the land. But to become so, you shall have to give up that which is most precious to you.’

The middle lady leaned forward, stroking the king’s son’s forehead. ‘You, brave little boy, shall be the smartest man in all the land. But to become so, you shall give up that which you care about the most.’

The old lady, for the king could not think of her as anything else, took the boy’s hand and waggled it gently. Her voice was soft and not at all what the king had expected. ‘You, young laddie, shall be the most powerful man in the world. But to become so, you shall give up that which you love the most.’

The ladies stepped back and turned to the king. He wasn’t sure whether what he’d just heard was exactly a blessing, but he had been raised to put hospitality above all else. ‘Thank you, ladies, for your kind words. Can I offer you something to eat or drink? I’m sure the kitchen is still making breakfast.’

The middle lady, whom the king found reminded him more and more of his wife, smiled warmly and shook her head. ‘We appreciate both your offer and the welcome to your house. But we have a long journey ahead of us. Thank you, your grace.’

The three bowed their way out of the room and the king was left with the wet nurse and his new son. He exchanged a look with the nurse before both of them looked down at the tiny bundle of life in her arms. ‘I believe it might be best were we to not mention this to the queen. Would you agree?’

The wet nurse blanched. Her training had in no way equipped her to deal with what to do when the king asked your opinion. Particularly not on something as important as withholding information from the queen. So she nodded and curtsied just as deep as she could and fled. When the lad found her nipple again, he sucked with such force that she imagined her breast being torn from her body.

 

Five years passed, and on his fifth birthday, the young prince went hunting with his father. It wasn’t an unusual occurrence and they enjoyed themselves as they always did. Astil was a spirited and lively young man and found great joy in sitting astride his horse and trotting around after his father.

They had the hounds out that day and Astil’s birthday present came with them. One of a litter of puppies born a few months earlier, the hound was his best friend and shared everything with him. When his nanny wasn’t watching, it even shared his dinner.

The hunt was far from the castle and traversing the great west fields, when something spooked the horses and they all set off at a canter. The king thought immediately of his boy, hauling on the reins and bringing himself alongside his son. He calmed his horse until the two of them were trotting calmly along. The hounds though, were off, racing across the field in pursuit of a hare or rabbit. Little Boxer went with them.

Astil thought the whole thing fun and happily watched his playmate trying gamely to keep up with the others. He soon fell behind though and the riders caught him up. It was at the exact moment Astil called his name that the pup’s leg caught in a rabbit hole and snapped. The sound was audible even above the gentle rumble of the horse’s hooves and the boy screamed.

Soon the dog was surrounded by men, including the king and his tearful son. It was decided that the leg was ruined and beyond repair. The king stood to one side, speaking in hushed tones to the Master of Hounds.

‘My liege, I know how fond your son is, but his dog will never become anything. It is bound for a life lounging before the fire. Is that any kind of dog for a king to have?’

The king pressed his lips tightly together and didn’t answer. The part of him his mother would have recognised was telling him it didn’t matter a whit what sort of a dog a king had. It was telling him that Astil was in love with this dog and why shouldn’t he have one that sat beside the fire and didn’t hunt like the others?

But another part of him was thinking something quite different. It was back in the throne room on that quiet Sunday morning, listening to the ladies.

This was the first thing Astil would have to give up. He was already growing into a handsome young man, but as blessings have a habit of doing, they had taken quite a turn in the king’s mind. His fear was not whether Astil would turn out handsome, but how he would turn out were he not to sacrifice something important. Would there be a scar? Or perhaps disease. There were bouts of flu going around that left survivors hideously scarred.

He nodded and cleared his throat. ‘You’re right. A king’s hound should be strong and healthy. What is the kindest way to finish this?’

The Master of Hounds looked oddly at the king, for just a second, then spoke in a heavy voice. ‘The dog is in pain. It would be best to put it down straight away, my liege.’

The king nodded his assent then turned his son and led him away. As in all things, the boy accepted his father’s words and concealed his flinch well when the pup’s whines were cut abruptly off. After the king put his son to bed that night, the young lad lay awake in the darkness for a long time, staring up at the ceiling as warm tears ran down both sides of his face.

 

Another five years passed and even at the age of ten, Astil was stealing hearts. Every cleaning maid and cook in the castle was secretly a little in love with the boy. He made it easy, having inherited his father’s kind manner and his mother’s heart. He was beloved out in the kingdom also, and often journeyed with his father to the towns and villages dotted around the vast valley over which they ruled.

It was during one of these journeys that young Astil celebrated his tenth birthday. On that day, the king and his son paraded through the streets whilst girls threw rose petals in their path and men cheered and raised their glasses. The sun was out and Astil’s smile was wide and without restraint.

They trotted down the cobbled streets until they reached a quieter part of town. Here, fruit trees grew over the walls from within gardens and the king plucked apples for them both to eat. The retinue followed at a distance, knowing well the king’s desire to spend time alone with his son. Whether the fates enjoyed irony, or simply had dubious senses of humour, no one will know, but it so happened that the king was mid way through telling the tale of the three ladies to his son, when Astil’s horse slipped.

The stallion had been his birthday present the previous year and since then the two had been inseparable. The bond between horse and rider had impressed even the Master of Horse and not a day had gone by in the last year when Astil hadn’t ridden Shadow.

On the cobbles of Old Town, where the fruit tumbled to the stone and rotted, Shadow’s feet slipped out from under his and he fell. Astil threw himself clear and landed without a scratch. The same could not be said for the horse. The sound of cracking bones brought the retinue racing over to where Shadow lay, whickering and twitching. One of his legs was twisted at a horrible angle and even the king looked away at first glance.

He drew the Master of Horse to one side and spoke in a quiet voice. ‘Is there any way we can save him?’

The master at horse nodded intently. ‘Of course, my liege. We can strap the leg and get him back to the castle on the wagon. It will take longer than I would like to get back, but Shadow is a tough horse, he can make it.’ The man hesitated and shrugged, ‘I should also tell you that the horse is in a great deal of pain and will never walk again.’

The king nodded, but he was barely listening. Already the voices were back in his head. It hadn’t been coincidence that he was finally telling the boy the story that had begun his life. No coincidence at all. He bade the Master of Horse strap the leg but no more, then called Astil over.

Standing together in the shade of the apple trees, with mottled grey stones behind them, the king finished the story. Once the words were done, he directed his son’s gaze across to his wounded horse and waited. Astil was a smart boy. Not perhaps the smartest, but quick enough. What would happen if he didn’t sacrifice his horse? The king had flashes of brain damage or some terrible blight sending him back to earliest childhood.

His fears, though, were unfounded.

‘Do you not think, father, that it would be cruel to drag the horse all the way home, only to have him spend the rest of his life in a stable? I think maybe it would be kinder in the long run to have him put to sleep here and now. What do you think, father?’

The king wrapped his arms around his son and pulled him close, nodding into the soft brown hair on his head. The young lad stiffened, trying perhaps to retain his pride and keep the tears within. Either way, he pulled himself free of his father’s arms and crossed the street to speak with the Master of Horse. The old man glanced up at the king and received a quick nod.

If the king saw the odd look thrown his way by the Master, he showed no signs of doing so.

The horse’s frantic neighs slowed and fell silent as the mushed apples were wet with warm blood. The king mounted his horse as Astil was brought a new mount. They rode back through the city and both raised their hands and smiled at the cheering subjects, even as their hearts refused to smile with them.

 

To be continued…