Part One is here

 

Red moved, one hand pushing Scarlet out the way. She pushed back, keeping herself between the two of them.

‘Hang on, just bloody hang on.’

She looked from Red, knife held out before her, teeth clamped together, to the champion, his hand poised over the hilt of the sword hanging at his waist. This was stupid.

‘This is stupid. We were sent here by some nasty guy from a dimension neither of us even live in. We don’t want to be here and have no intention of staying. If you’re bored, I get it. This isn’t the most exciting place in the world, but do you really need to kill two innocent girls?’

He looked at her, eyes leaving Red for a moment. His brows moved, like two millipedes creeping slowly toward one another. ‘You are trespassers.’

‘No we’re not. We’re victims of a crime. We were sent here against our will. Your beef is with the guy who sends people here, just so you can kick their asses. He’s, like, totally taking the piss out of you.’

She held her breath, head tucked into her chest. His hands moved slowly away from his waist and folded before him. Red didn’t move a muscle. ‘Stop it, put the knife away.’ Scarlet hissed at her and she hissed straight back. ‘This is a trick.’

Scarlet shook her head vehemently. ‘It’s not, now put it away.’

Red raised her eyebrows and smiled slightly. ‘You have teeth. Very well.’

The knife slid into its sheath and Scarlet let out a slow breath. She turned back to the champion. ‘We didn’t mean to trespass, honestly. This guy’s, like, some sort of killer for the government. He was supposed to kill us but Red kicked his arse so he sent us here when we were trying to get home.’

‘Can you show me the world you were on?’

‘Um, I could take you there.’

‘That is unnecessary, just show it to me.’

‘How do I do that?’

Another of the looks. She smiled sweetly and imagined him wearing a lolita dress. That worked. He waved his hand before him and the darkness vanished. Above her was a night sky like she’d never seen before. Millions of stars so bright they was blinding. She stared, open mouthed. There was only one thing to do at this point.

She sat down and lay back, spreading her arms and legs so she was bathed in starlight, the only thing she could see.

‘Which world were you on?’

‘Um, the one just to the left I think.’

Red giggled, which was weird coming from her. The champion shifted. She knew because he sounded a bit like an avalanche.

‘Think of the world you were on and watch.’

She stared up, picturing the warehouse and the van and house that looked just like hers but wasn’t. One of the stars grew suddenly brighter and seemed to come closer. Then she realised that the rest of them were getting further away. As they faded she could make out planets orbiting the star, or sun, or whatever. One of them came closer and she pointed at it.

‘That, I’m guessing, is the right one.’

The champion grunted his assent and the stars were gone, plunging them back into darkness. She groaned, clutching her chest. That was the most beautiful thing she’d seen in, like, forever. ‘Bring them back.’

She sat up, but he wasn’t listening to her. He was drawing huge circles in the air before him. With each wave of his hand a pale blue line appeared, growing stronger with each repetition. Soon a circle made of glowing energy hung before him. It was, she had to admit, a pretty clever trick.

‘Who’s your boss? I mean, who puts you here to stop trespassers?’

The champion turned away from the circle. Scarlet caught a glimpse of it from his side and saw Skinny Scarlet’s world through it. A really clever trick.

‘Do you really need to ask that question?’

‘Uh, yeah?’

He seemed nonplussed and stared at her. She glanced at Red who shook her head and shrugged. Finally he answered.

‘I don’t know.’

She got the feeling this was the first time he’d been asked. His brows were furrowed, the millipedes finally meeting and doing their best to mate. She had the sudden and probably suicidal urge to give him a hug. Which was really weird cos hugging anyone other than Lara and occasionally Martin when he was recovering from something close to fatal, really wasn’t her thing.

‘I mean, it doesn’t matter, I was just curious. Really, don’t worry about it.’

He grunted and turned back to the… what was it? A portal? Sounded cool. His shoulders hunched. ‘You’re going to worry about it, aren’t you?’

There was no response for a moment, then he sighed and nodded. She tried to pat him on the back, but only managed to reach his bum. She patted that, trying to imagine where he got clothes from. Or shoes. His boots were large enough for her to live in. ‘Really, it doesn’t matter. I mean, you’re happy with your job, right?’

He growled and she took a hurried step back. Red was beside her, hand on her knife, but Scarlet grabbed her arm. He turned, his face screwed up.

‘What is happy?’

Scarlet laughed. ‘Excellent question. Some people say it’s found in a slushy, others chocolate. For me, it would have to be a cup of tea where the cup’s quarter filled with sugar. There’s just something about it, the way the spoon stands up straight and you feel your arteries thicken as you drink it. How about you, Red?’

They were both giving her the look. It was like being with two Martins at the same time, only neither of them did pompous quite as well. She felt something she thought might be regret, though it could be wind. His face creased up, the implacable thing done with and replaced by someone who looked a little bit like a school boy. Only with a really big sword. And if that didn’t sound like some dodgy innuendo, she didn’t know what did.

‘Look, maybe it’s best if we just forget I asked. We can—’

Red put her hand on her shoulder and shook her head.

‘What?’

‘Don’t deny yourself.’

‘Huh?’

‘Scarlet. You came into my world and took me away and everything has changed. You came to this place and affected its champion. You are a Focus, a centre point for change. Don’t deny it, be proud of it.’

‘Huh?’

‘This being needs your help, just as we need his. Who are you to deny it?’

‘But doesn’t that mess everything up? What if he needs to be here?’

‘If someone needs to be here, the being that created him will just create another.’

Scarlet put both hands to her head. This was way too much responsibility. She could handle a goldfish, maybe, she’d got that far, but she’d need Lara’s help. This was just silly. Mmm, leather. She blinked, dragging her eyes away from Red’s chest and turning back to the champion.

He was frozen, gazing through the portal, but his mind was clearly on another planet. Hah, that was good. She put herself between him and the portal so he had no choice but to look at her.

He asked again. ‘What is happy?’

‘Can you tell me how you feel?’

She was a counsellor, like the weird lady at school who thought she was everyone’s friend. Only Scarlet wasn’t wearing enough bad jewellery. The lines on his forehead were deep enough for her to lose a finger in and his head rocked from side to side.

‘I feel… nothing.’

She sighed. This wasn’t going to be as easy as she’d hoped. ‘Okay, well, that’s fine. In that case, don’t worry about happy, cos it ain’t gonna happen. But on the plus side, you’re never going to be depressed either, and trust me, that’s way better than any happiness. Absence of depression is about the best we can hope for.’

Did he know she was talking crap? Was she? She’d give up all her happiness just to not feel the nothing that came every now and then and made her hide in bed all day and get scared of people seeing her. That was real, and true. And the happiness she did have didn’t make those days any better. It wasn’t like she could store it up and use it when she needed it…

Dammit.

‘Look, happy is when you do something nice, or when someone says something nice to you, or… here, try this. You are the scariest champion I’ve ever met, I bet you do your job amazingly.’

He nodded slowly. ‘I am the best. There has never been a survivor from my realm.’

‘How do you feel?’

‘Nothing.’

She groaned. ‘Can we just go and rescue Scarlet now?’

He shook himself, the bizarre topography of his dreads resettling like vines after an earthquake. ‘We will deal with the man who sent you here. It is not my place to become otherwise involved.’

‘But think of how good you’d feel…’ She trailed off, blushing. That wasn’t going to work. ‘Let’s go and deal with Martin who isn’t Martin.’

They turned to the portal and the champion stepped through. Red and Scarlet grabbed hands, more from habit than anything else, and followed him. They emerged in the back alley from which they’d come and Scarlet gasped, staring at the last place she’d seen Martin who wasn’t Martin. He was gone, a smear of blood left on the brickwork, the only sign he was ever there.

A light came on, harsh brilliance that made her cover her eyes. ‘You’ve returned. And so soon. That saves us the wait, so thank you.’ The voice was smug and punchable.

‘Champion, can you take them all out?’

His rumble boomed off the alleyway walls. ‘I can level worlds.’

‘Okay, well, maybe just knock a few out so we can get away, that’ll probably be fine.’

‘Please, lay down any weapons you may have. Including the knife, Miss Red.’

Scarlet laughed and the light vanished. Her laughter stopped. The three council members she’d spoken to were at the end of the alley, surrounded by gun-toting inspectors. In front of them stood Skinny Scarlet, gun held to her head by Martin who wasn’t Martin.