This one was trickier to write than the last few. I found inspiration on a walk very similar to the one Lana takes with her parents, but after spending the evening wrestling with it, had to put it aside and finish it today. It could still benefit from some tweaking, but I’m happy enough to post it and invite comments now. Happy reading. 🙂 

 

‘I hate you, leave me alone.’

The door slammed behind her and she stared at it until the shaking in her hands died away. She stomped across the room, making sure every footfall would be heard in the kitchen below, and threw herself onto the bed.

I mean it, she thought. I mean it for real this time. They’ve evil, pure evil. The entire point of their existence is to ruin mine. Why do they hate me so much? Why did they even have me if they didn’t like me?

She rolled over and stared at the wall. Down below in the kitchen, the shouting started up, same as always. She pulled her pillow over her head and waited for the inevitable slam of the back door. It came quicker than usual this time as dad stormed out.

Peace descended.

Lana tensed, her back becoming the barrier with which she defended herself against the inevitable tapping on her bedroom door.

‘Sweetheart, can I come in?’

‘Go away.’

‘Come on now, sweetie, there’s no need for that.’

‘Go away and leave me alone. I never want to talk to you again.’

The door clicked open and Lana tightened her shoulders. If she curled in a tight-enough ball, mum wouldn’t be able to unroll her. She wished she had spines so mum couldn’t even come close. Her bed sagged and mum’s hand landed on her arm.

‘Please, darling, I need you.’

She needed her. What a joke that was. If she needed her, maybe she should be nice instead of judging her. Judging her was all she ever did, over and over again.

‘Go away.’

‘Please, darl—’

‘Go away, go away, GO AWAY.’ Tears came running down her face as she sat up. Mum jumped off the bed and Lana felt good for all of a second about the look on her face. Then the guilt set in. She opened her mouth, but by then the life had gone from mum’s eyes and she was backing away.

The door clicked quietly shut. Lana grabbed her pillow and threw it, following it up with Mr Tricks. The rabbit bounced off the door, rolled over and came up looking at her. His glass eyes, once so cute, seemed to mock her. She scowled at him but received only the usual smile, so she turned away to face the wall.

Lana liked this patch of wall. It was plain and white and simple and didn’t ask her any questions or shout at her. She stared at it until her teeth finally stopped clenching and the sound of mum doing meaningless baking drifted up through the floor.

 

The next day they went for a walk. It was one of their mundane, inane, pointless Sunday activities that was supposed to be quality family time, but was instead excruciating and boring. Lana quickened her pace the minute they reached the river path. She got far enough ahead that she couldn’t feel the glares being exchanged above her head.

Why didn’t they get a divorce? Shauna’s parents got a divorce when she was, like, nine, and she was fine. They said it was for her, but since they both hated her and everything she was, it made no sense.

They hadn’t always hated her. It seemed to start when they moved here.

She’d liked living in the city. Apparently they came out here for her as well. She paused to stare at the ducks. They were digging at one another with their beaks and making sounds not unlike mum and dad when they were having a bad day. She scowled at them and wandered on.

The schools were better here, apparently. She’d only been in comprehensive school for three years, but she already knew it wasn’t better than where she’d been. There were less people and not one of them knew anything about the world. They all had two parents and nice cars and skiing holidays. Except Shauna, of course, but Shauna was different.

She grinned and pulled out her phone. She could text Shau—

‘Lana!’

She ground her teeth together and put it back in her pocket. This was that counselor’s fault. No phones at the weekend, unless you were alone. She took a deep breath and wrinkled her nose at the smell of duck poo. She was fourteen, what the hell did they care if she had her phone out?

It was better than talking to her parents. Or listening to them quietly bitch at one another.

‘Lana, your mother and I would like to talk to you about something.’

She glanced back. Dad was staring at the ducks and scowling. So this was gonna be good. She looked at mum. She looked so tired. She looked so pathetic.

Lana set off. She raced away from the river and across the grass. There were wide meadows beside the water with tall, narrow trees at the far end. The sun was low in the sky, throwing shadows the length of the field.

She ran so the wind blew out her hair and made her cheeks sting. She laughed, though she had no idea why she was laughing. Maybe it was the sound of mum’s voice, calling her to come back. Maybe it was just better than crying.

The shadows played across her face like fingers, first pressing down, then away, then down again.

She ran through a shadow larger than most and her laughter dried up like two day old cereal. It felt like someone had grabbed her heart and given it a good squeeze. She gasped as the air in her throat became so cold she couldn’t breathe. Then she left it behind and the sun stole the shock.

The next shadow was bigger still and she had a second to realise there were no trees big enough to cast one that big before she reached it. She plunged into the shadow and out of the sun, and the world went black.

 

Lana stopped so fast her shoulders didn’t realise and she nearly toppled forward. Her hands went out to stop her fall and someone grabbed them. She screamed and flailed about, fending off her mysterious attacker.

‘Please, young lady, be careful where you swing those things.’

That wasn’t mum or dad. With an accent like that, it may as well be the queen. Why was it so dark? She blinked and looked behind her. Darkness. Complete and utter darkness.

She looked forward again and saw something. A glint, like light catching metal. A flame burst into life and she covered her eyes, squinting.

‘Oh goodness, I am sorry, how thoughtless of me. Here.’

The light dimmed considerably and she cautiously removed her hand. The man held a lantern. It was one of those old fashioned ones, with black, wrought iron top and bottom and, at the moment, an iron guard in front. The bearer suited the lantern perfectly.

He wore trousers that ended an inch or two above his perfectly shined, black leather shoes. His waistcoat and top hat only added to the impression that she was talking to someone from, like, the 1960s. He also had a moustache, which was very much eww, but not as bad as some she’d seen.

‘Are you doing Movember?’

‘I’m sorry?’

‘You know, that charity thing?’

He frowned and shook his head. ‘I’m sorry, young lady, I’m not entirely sure what Movember is. But I am fairly confident that I’m not taking part in it.’

‘Right. Where am I?’

‘Where are you? You are in the Shadow Lands, where else?’

‘Well, I kinda thought I was in Marlow.’

‘Oh, well, perhaps you were. You all come from somewhere. But now you are here.’

‘Great, thanks, very helpful. Where are mum and dad?’

‘Where did you say you thought you were?’

‘Marlow?’

‘Yes. I would imagine they are there, then.’

‘Right. What?’

‘The Shadow Lands. My domain.’ He frowned. ‘I am sorry, I’m being remiss in my hospitality. My name is Mr Wilson, welcome to my home.’

‘Right. What?’

He smiled and waved a hand. The world lit up around her and she covered her eyes again. She looked around and saw the fields and the river. Mum and dad were on the towpath, staring wide eyed towards her. She waved. ‘Hey, I’m here.’

They took no notice of her. Not a surprise. Then mum ran towards her and Lana spotted the tears on her cheeks. What the hell. Mum was running, actual real running and she wasn’t slowing down. Lana leapt aside, but mum kept going.

‘Mum, I’m here.’

‘She cannot hear you.’

‘Why not?’

‘You are in the Shadow Lan—’

‘Yeah, you said that. What does it mean.’ She blinked, surprised by the tears pricking the corners of her eyes.

‘Look around you. Properly.’

Lana did, scrubbing her eyes with one hand. The shadows that fell across the field were darker now, richer. It was like someone had come along and painted them onto the grass. The sunlight, on the other hand, was pale and barely worth mentioning. Lana shivered. ‘Where am I?’ she muttered it to herself, but Wilson heard her.

‘You have left behind the world that you know and journeyed into Shadow. We lie behind the reality to which you have become accustomed. We walk just behind them and just in front, but never with.’

‘Why?’

‘Ahh, a better question. I would hazard a guess you saw something here that was better than what you had out there.’

‘That wouldn’t be difficult.’

‘There you are, then.’

‘But…’ she rubbed her face with the palms of her hands and shook her head. ‘I mean, what?’

He patted her gently on the shoulder. He wore black gloves but it was still touching. She shied away.

‘I apologise. Some find a little physical contact reassuring at this time.’

‘Don’t you physical contact me. How old are you?’

‘As old as the sun, more or less.’

‘Oh…’ Her thoughts ran around like a headless dog. They wanted to please her, but had no idea where to start. There was a very strong possibility she was still asleep. It was that or she’d fallen in the river and this was drowning. It was far more interesting than she’d imagined.

‘Would you like to take the tour?’

‘The tour?’

‘Indeed. You have to choose a shadow.’

‘What?’

‘You seem to like that word. You might find adding more detail to your questions garners more helpful answers.’

She scowled at him. He reminded her of dad, only without shouting at her. ‘Fine. Why do I have to choose a shadow?’

‘Well. You’ve come to the Shadow Lands and most who do so, choose a shadow.’

‘What if I don’t want to?’

‘You may leave any time you like.’

‘What, like, right now?’

He held out a hand. ‘Please, be my guest.’

Lana looked past him to where mum had turned around and was stumbling back across the field. Dad was digging about near the trees, like she’d burrowed beneath them. Mum shouted something and dad scowled at her and threw his arms up. She could go back and make them alright. For all of five minutes.

‘Okay, where do we start?’

Shadows smiled and set off. As he walked, the light around them dimmed until the world went away and left the two of them marching in the glow of his lantern.

 

Part Two will be here Thursday 4th December